Friends are extremely important and friendship is a major part of our lives. If there’s one thing we can all agree on, it’s that friends are awesome. Having friends is similar to having family. During the good times and the bad, through thick and thin, your best friends are there for you. They are the people that you can count on in your greatest time of need. They can help you in times of trouble, and be there to enjoy and share the great parts of your life too. Our friends are the people we can rely on to give us the much needed support and comfort that we all seek in life. Knowing that you have friends is a wonderful feeling but something that we learn a lot about us as we get older is our two types of friends. There are various types of friends.
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There are friends that are very great and have friendships that have great depth and longevity, and there are also some friends that are not that good in keeping relationships and only have friendships that are only short-lived and somewhat superficial but time cannot always tell whether that friend is real or not. So what really are the two types of friends? These two types of friends are our “so called friends” or fake friends and our real friends. According to the Urban Dictionary, a fake friend is someone who only acts as your friend when they require a service from you.
A fake friend is someone who uses you, talks to you even though they don’t like you and they only talk to you to damage your social life. Fake friends can be very jealous and insecure and they talk behind your back without regrets. On the other hand, a real friend is someone who is always by your side and has a special place in your heart. Real friends are always there to protect and defend you; they are the people who always believe you when no one else believes in you.
Sometimes, it is hard to differentiate our fake friends from our true friends. It takes time to know their differences. So, in order to differentiate them, you must know their similarities and differences. Fake: Asks for favors often, but never offers to do favors for you. In fact, they may refuse or feel burdened if they do anything for you Real: Will offer to help before you even ask and if you do ask, they help out, willingly and without resentment
Fake: Talks about you behind your back Real: If they have a problem with you, they discuss it, face to face, and in a respectful and mature manner.
Fake: One-dimensional. They see only their needs and is oblivious to needs of others. They often use you as a sounding board and you rarely get a word in. Real: They are in-tune enough to sense your pain, your needs and are supportive. They are the type who listens attentively and with concern and interest. Each of you will have your time to vent and be heard. It won’t be one-sided as it is with a fake friend.
Fake: Full of excuses for why they have no time for you – often only coming around when they want something and that something isn’t YOU Real: Wants to make time for you because they genuinely enjoy being with you and “choose” to nurture the friendship
Fake: Their actions don’t back up their words. Promises are often broken and you can’t trust much of what they say or do. You never really get to know who they are because they wear a mask of deception. Real: Their actions are proportionate to their words, instilling trust and dependability. They are the first person you think of where trust is concerned. You know them in depth because they have opened up in a way that allows you to know and trust them.
Fake: Makes fun of your imperfections, passing their words off as a joke Real: Overlooks your imperfections and if you choose to improve yourself, they are encouraging and supportive. They may even join in.
Fake: Will try to lead you down a destructive path Real: Will encourage you to go down a constructive path. They will be by your side as you do.
Fake: Will drain your energy dry, often causing you stress in their presence. Real: Will enhance your energy and make you feel more alive.
Fake: Cuts you down quite frequently. You begin to wonder if they are jealous or very insecure. Real: Builds you up and acknowledges your accomplishments, no matter how small. They are happy about good things happening to you as if they were happening to them. They aren’t jealous, but encouraging.
Fake: You feel like running from Real: You feel like running to
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A friend is always a friend, right? Well no, not exactly. There are different levels of friendship which are never really obvious on the surface; it is only when you reach a crisis point in your life that you find out just who your true friends are. Of course we have our best friends who are often closer to us than family; they share all of our secrets and know us inside out. We all have �fair weather friends� who help us to celebrate and only arrive on our doorsteps when they need something from us, and then there are invisible friends who aren�t really there at all!
If you really believe that you have at least one true friend, who cares about you and will stand by you through the good times and the bad consider this: if you were to lose your job, your car and be on the verge of losing your home would they still be there for you? Would they pop round for a cuppa and a chat for no other reason than to see how you were doing? It is in tough times like these that you discover just who your true friends are, when you reach out for support during your darkest days and find that they are still there to support you.
A Decreasing Social Circle
You may believe that you have a wide circle of friends, but when the time comes that the partying and socialising has to come to an end and instead of sending out party invitations you are issuing requests for help and support, just see how many answer the call. By the end of the process you should consider yourself lucky if can count the friends that are left on one hand and truly blessed if you need both hands to count them.
� They never forget your birthday and always make sure that they get to see you, no matter what plans have already been made.
� If your car is off the road they will offer to drive you even if it means that they are going out of their way to do so, neither will they accept any petrol money from you for doing it.
� You can laugh together until you both have tears running down your face.
� You can sit in silence together and still feel comfortable.
� Even if you only see each other two or three times a year, when you are together it�s like you have never been apart.
� They will tell you the truth even if it hurts because they love you.
� They won�t just tell you the things that they know you want to hear to keep you happy.
� They will offer their unfailing support no matter what you try to do, even if they don�t agree with your choices they will support you in them.
� When they offer you a compliment it is genuine and from the heart.
� They won�t say anything behind your back or gossip about you when you are not there.
� They know what makes you happy, your favourite film; sweet treat, your dress size and what colours you prefer to wear.
� They will to listen to you moan and rant and offer you a shoulder to cry on whenever you need it.
� They know about all of your insecurities but won�t broadcast them to the masses.
� When you need advice they will offer straight talking sense.
� You find it hard to imagine your life without them in it.
� You have never felt comfortable enough with them to tell them a secret.
� They have never asked about your family and you have never shared any details of your family with them.
� You normally only spend time with them in a group setting, never on a one to one basis.
� They have never seen the real you, they only see the fa�ade that you put on when you are part of the group.
� They forget your birthday and other important dates.
� You often get the impression that they are only calling you because no one else was available.
� You laugh and have fun but it�s not feel good, belly aching laughter.
� You have never seen each other cry.
� You find it difficult to be yourself when you are around them.
� Any silences between you are awkward and you feel the need to fill them with conversation.
� If you don�t see each other for a few months you would probably forget they existed at all.
� It can feel as though your relationship is all one sided � you are making all the effort.
� They talk about your insecurities in public and embarrass you.
� You find yourself agreeing with them so as to keep the peace and not get into an argument.
� It�s easy to imagine your life without them in it.
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- Comment #1 (Posted by Realhuman)
Fake Friends will offer you a dime then claim dollars off you.
Fake Friends will torn you apart piece by piece in the most shallow and shadiest way.
Fake Friends will expect you to fist fight their enemies while it could be settled by simply calling the Police.
Fake Friends will get you 24/7 drunk.
There won't be any Fake Friends when one has no expectation, and greed from anyone.
All you need from Real Friends is those whom get you sober. (this is extremely rare to come by, unless is your wife/parents.) If there is/are someone with such aspects in the modern world, you should cherish that.
- Comment #2 (Posted by Javier)
- Comment #3 (Posted by an unknown user)
Thanks, you are right on real friend. For fake friends I say you may discover it later on with real situations especially if you have very very good news, the fake friends won't be happy for you, trust me.
- Comment #4 (Posted by Riya)
That is really true, awesome, I liked it too much, this all helped me to find my best friend!!
- Comment #5 (Posted by Kevin Hang)
- Comment #6 (Posted by Ceunfin)
It's true and I hope one day I'll have real friends :)
- Comment #7 (Posted by Denise Ann)
Soo true :)
- Comment #8 (Posted by an unknown user)
It's a helpful article!
- Comment #9 (Posted by Jim)
True friends are few and far between. I prefer certain family members instead of fakes who could care less if you live or die. Want to lose a "friend"? Tell them you lost your job and home. Uh ummm ah cough cough "You know I would IF,.............". That's what I thought LOL
- Comment #10 (Posted by Kushal)
I guess it is true to some extent but it is not a necessity for them to be true for you to call someone your true/real friends.